The Reasons Why Some People Fail To Admit Mistakes

Just as Alexander Pope once said: “Making mistakes is human; to forgive, divine ”. But, we live in a time of apparent perfection. Today, there are many who do not like to admit mistakes. In addition, politicians do not take responsibility for when they do something wrong, and institutions ignore their own shortcomings.

Why is it so difficult for people to admit their mistakes? It is more likely that people will apologize for something they did, than that they bravely admit mistakes they have made. A study from Ohio State University showed this.

Psychologists Roy Lewick and Leah Polin discovered that it is easier for people to say “Sorry if I offended you” than “You are right, I made a mistake”. With the former, the goal is to fix the emotional aspect without taking full responsibility, as opposed to what happens when someone openly admits that they were wrong.

It is not easy to admit to others you are not perfect. The classic desire to be flawless, harmless and extremely effective can create very severe and unhealthy situations. It can be easy to forget that happiness is not about being perfect. It’s about being human!

Finally, admitting mistakes is an exceptional opportunity to grow and improve oneself.

Factors that may explain why people fail to admit mistakes

People who do not admit mistakes make us feel frustrated at first. We try to get them to understand our point of view eventually, but then we give up. This is because these people have such rigid personalities and have such poor social skills that we realize that it is not worth it to be discouraged because of them.

Last year, the New York Times published an interesting article on just this topic. Paul Krugman, a professor at Princeton University, pointed out that we live in a world with an epidemic of infallibility. We can clearly see this in politicians who desperately want to show a picture of absolute perfection.

Admitting a mistake and taking responsibility for bad decisions is a red line that no one wants to cross. This is mainly due to the classic idea that admitting mistakes is a sign of weakness. And in a world of constant uncertainty, showing weakness is the same as jumping off a cliff.

Beyond this familiar social scenario, it is also interesting to observe the people closest to us who do not admit their mistakes at all. Why are they like that?

Narcissism

Brunel University London conducted an interesting study where they analyzed different personalities and how people interacted on social media. Narcissists were those who are obsessed with displaying their achievements and strengths.

However, this type of personality, which is characterized by a very positive self-image, almost never admits to having done anything wrong. Doing so represents a direct violation of their expectations of themselves. They will always prefer to point out everyone else’s mistakes.

Personal irresponsibility

Personal irresponsibility is associated with emotional immaturity and lack of social skills. Thus, one can see that people who do not admit their mistakes lack important socialization skills.

“If I do not take responsibility for my mistakes, I assume that they do not exist and that my actions have no consequences. Therefore, I can do anything. “This personal focus inevitably leads us to error and unhappiness.

Defense mechanisms

We all make mistakes. When we do, we have two options. The first and most sensible thing is to admit that we failed and take responsibility. The second is to refuse and use a defense mechanism. Cognitive dissonance is definitely more common; some choose to ignore or not accept two conflicting situations so that their identity remains intact.

For example, an article in the European Journal of Social Psychology pointed  to something quite interesting. People who chose not to take responsibility for their mistakes thought it made them stronger and that they had more power over others and themselves. Therefore, they know that they failed and that there is cognitive dissonance, but they choose to drown it out to protect their own egos.

People who do not admit their mistakes use many psychological strategies to avoid taking responsibility. It is not easy to try to make sense of them. However, this does not mean that it is impossible. It is never too late to decide to be more human, admit mistakes and thus grow as human beings.