Love Has A Limit, And Its Name Is Dignity

Love will always have a limit, and that is dignity, because the respect each of us has for ourselves has a very high price, and it will never accept a love that is not fulfilling, that hurts us and makes us vulnerable.

Pablo Neruda said that love is short and forgetting takes a very long time. So therefore, in the meantime, it is always the “light of the firefly” that naturally flares up in the dark nights to show us where the limit is, to remind us that it is better to spend a long time forgetting than to be tormented for a long time, where we end up selling our dignity.

Sometimes there is no other solution than to forget how we feel to remember what we are worth, for dignity should not be lost to anyone, because one should not ask for love, and even though love should never be lost because of pride , we must not lose our dignity over love either.

Believe it or not , dignity is the fragile, delicate thread that we compromise so many times over, which can be shattered to the point that our emotional relationships begin to unravel. There are many times when we cross this border without wanting it. We are swept away by extremes where our moral thoughts become weak. We believe that everything is worth it for love, and that everything we give up is less valuable.

Because love and dignity are two currents in a cramped sea where even the most experienced sailor can lose his way.

The pride and dignity of self-love

It is often said that the ego feeds our pride and the spirit our dignity. Whatever the case, these two psychological dimensions are two everyday inhabitants of the complex islands of our emotional relationships, and sometimes they get confused.

Pride, for example, is an enemy that we know all too well and that tends to be associated with self-love. Still, it goes a step further, because pride is an architect who specializes in building walls and weaving intricacies of barbed wire in our relationships, in spice up every detail with arrogance, and in preparing victims for every word. But beneath all these destructive acts, there is actually something hidden; Low self-esteem.

When it comes to dignity, it is the opposite. It works by listening to the voice of our inner “me” at all times to support self-respect, without forgetting respect for others. Here the concept of self-love gets its maximum meaning because we are fed by it to protect ourselves without harming others,  without causing “safety” effects, but validating our own self-esteem all the time.

Dignity has a very high price

Dignity is not sold, nor lost or given away, because a defeat at the right time will always be worth more than a victory if we manage to get out of the fight in one piece, with our heads high, and our hearts whole.

Martyrdom and resignation do not fit into healthy and dignified love. When we put ourselves in their shadow, there will no longer be many sunny days for our hearts or food for our hopes.

Because of this and to avoid falling into these spasmodic currents of emotion, it is worth taking the time to reflect on the following questions that can undoubtedly help you:

• In emotional situations, victims have boundaries to mark. We are not obligated to give an answer to all the problems our partner has, to offer them air every time they breathe, nor to turn off our own light so that theirs can shine. Remember where the real limit is: in your dignity.
• Love is felt, touched and created every day. If we do not perceive any of these things, it will serve no purpose to ask for it, much less to sit there and wait for a miracle to happen that does not make sense. If we assume that we are no longer loved, it is an act of courage that will prevent us from drifting into situations that are as delicate as they are destructive.

• Love must never be blind. No matter how much this idea is defended in society, it is necessary to remember that it is always better to offer oneself to someone with eyes open, a heart enlightened and very strong dignity. Only then will we be the true creators of the worthy conditions that are worth the effort, with a focus on respecting and being respected, on creating a healthy situation without power play or irrational sacrifices.

Dignity is and will always be recognition that we are worthy of better things. It will always be better to have dignified loneliness than a life of incomplete relationships. Do not allow it, do not lose your dignity over anyone.