Have You Ever Fallen In Love With Hopes And Dreams?
It has happened to all of us, after a few years your partner’s different behaviors and habits start to bother you. Looking back, you already knew that your partner behaved this way, but everything just went unnoticed. The reason is that you fell in love with hopes and dreams.
The infatuation phase of a relationship can lead to real destruction. It can dazzle you and take away common sense to the point where you think you are capable of doing wrong things to the other person, someone you see as perfect. But it is difficult to realize that this is not real. This perfection exists only in our thoughts. Your feelings, expectations, hopes and dreams dazzled you. Things are not as they seem.
To be in love with hopes and dreams
When we believe that a person has changed, we should consider whether we saw the person he or she really was from the beginning. Probably the answer is “no”. At the beginning of a relationship, you create an image of your partner that makes you perceive them as an incomparable beauty, an expression of perfection and wonder.
No one is perfect, as you should have guessed. But the image you create in your mind about the other person, which is the result of a deep love for them, becomes part of your reality in that time. Thus, you end up believing your own lie, ignoring any attitude that bothers you or that you do not like. In fact, this is one of the reasons why many people repeat harmful relationship patterns.
Juan’s story
Juan was very confused and bored. He hesitated between continuing the relationship or ending it altogether. It seemed like everything had exploded. Suddenly it seemed that there was nothing he liked about his partner. Her complaints, her manner… Everything eroded his patience. He wanted to see the situation from a different perspective to find out what had actually happened, but he could not.
What happened to Juan was that in the beginning, everything was amazing. He saw his partner as a beautiful, perfect, responsible and very good person. But with time and without really knowing why, everything changed. The person he had fallen in love with had very bad days that Juan found intolerable. Mood swings, absurd complaints…
Juan’s partner was not comfortable with the relationship or did not know how to deal with what happened outside the relationship, such as work-related stress. The problem, however, was that when Juan talked to his friends about the situation, he seemed to be referring to two completely different people. So much so, that the people he was talking about did not really exist. They were not real.
Juan did not see his partner as she was, and he never did. At first, the hopes and dreams he had about the relationship made him just see her as perfect. His emotions prevented him from seeing anything wrong. He still did not see his partner as she was. His feelings simply did not allow him to do so. Juan had never known who he really was with.
Learn to see others as they are
Learning to see others as they are is difficult, but not impossible. Is it not true that you do not have the same expectations of a friend as a partner? The same goes for siblings, if you have them. You see these people as they are, with their good and bad sides.
But when you start a relationship with another person, you usually only see their good side in the beginning. But over time, you end up with bars focusing on the bad guys. This causes serious problems and can change the relationship dramatically.
The important thing to be aware of is that when you fall in love, the image of your partner is distorted to perfection. Knowing that this is happening and taking it into account during this period opens the door to another reality, the one where the person has good and bad sides. In addition, it is important to remember that just as the other person has certain attitudes and behaviors that we love, there will also be others that we do not agree with or like at all.
We should not blame ourselves for falling in love with hopes and dreams. Romantic love makes this happen. But the moment we realize this and become aware of it, we can do something to change it. Have you ever fallen in love with hopes and dreams?
